Passion

I feel happy cos I made someone happier tonight. :) I'm glad for that...was praying throughout the trip on the bus that I could help. And yah...I think bro counseling is my strength and its my PASSION. The next counseling diploma course starts in July and I gotto sign up by 31st May for a discount so that means I must go sign up soon for it. It feels really good helping someone...after the stuffs I've been through, God must have brought me thru them for a reason.
Well first of all, I can understand how it feels to really HATE yourself, and waking up to realise that you are yourself, and there are things u really wanna change but can't change. I sometimes struggle with myself, like why can't I be more confident, decisive and bold? That makes me depressed. But then I realised that I have my own strengths which are sensitivity, patience and empathy. And then I love myself for being me, cos God created me unique, and I'm glad there's only one of me!

What is life all about? Well some ple wanna die, but some ple wanna live and can't live. This girl- Joan, only 18 or 19 I think, recently just passed away from cancer. Think most of u would have seen her in the newspapers. So young and so much potential. She really loved life..
So what is it about life that makes it worthy to live? U know these days when I wake up, I sometimes wake up with this feeling...another horrible day, another dreaded day of meaningless work. And then I "psycho" myself that today I will meet new ple, do new things and do stuffs that are meaningful. What gives me a horrible feeling to the day? A sense that what I am doing is meaningless, not being able to see a light at the end of the tunnel, and knowing that someone I love is not gonna be with me...
But what turns it around to a good day is...
knowing that each day is created by God, and knowing that this day I am going to do something purposeful. To me purpose= helping ple. Though now the structure of how and whom to help is really frizzy.
What makes life worth living? When u know there are ple who care for u, love u and be there for u. I think parents esp....love us always, no matter what.

As much as we talk abt aspirations and values and beliefs and all that, I'm not sure how many of u feel this way, but smtimes I feel what really convinces me is acceptance and love. I mean..if u step into a church and u feel that something about the values don't ressonate within, at least u have a comfy bunch of ple u feel happy with, and u feel valued, loved and respected. Thats how I feel. And thats how I think many ple need to feel. ACCEPTANCE, and love.....instead of rejection...

What makes a day horrid......what makes one depressed...is when....
the mind is crowded with a negative thought that won't go away and it clouds one's mind and goes around in loops. It takes tremendous courage and encouragement to come out of that loop and to think differently. Sometimes it is hard for one to think out of that loop, he needs a sensible fren to tell him to think differently. I think that matters a lot. => Yah..
As for me there are still things that bug me...but I'm taking heart. And knowing that everyday I live is a blessing from God. :)